A therapist’s approach to marriage counseling is so incredibly important because there is so much at stake. It’s often not only the relationship that hangs in the balance, but also both individual’s emotions, self-esteem, and well-being. Who you choose as a therapist matters. Their experience, training, and specialty can often be the difference between success and deep frustration.
Traditional Therapy vs. Our Wellness Model
Most therapists perform traditional marriage counseling from a neutral and pathology foundation. Problems are worked on immediately and the goal of therapy is to solve these problems. Unfortunately, 70+ years of tracking results show this approach often leaves the couple feeling overwhelmed and is one of several reasons marriage counseling has a bad and somewhat scary reputation in our communities.
For over 30+ years I’ve been specializing in couples counseling and working with the leading experts in the relationship and marriage counseling field. Our profession is changing and Well Marriage Center is helping to lead the way. Our therapeutic model is strengths-based because it’s proven to be more effective. Our therapists are trained to begin your very first assessment with questions that bring your relational strengths to the forefront of therapy. We use and build on these strengths as the foundation for the work we do together. Ideally you are willing to strengthen your relationship before working on problems, but when the problems are too severe we work immediately on stopping destructive and toxic behaviors and patterns. Improving your relationship (friendship, bond) is the new goal of therapy and actually improves your ability to problem solve. Our “positive analysis” continues to happen into and throughout your improvement. The more a couple understands the reasons for your improvement, the more likely it is to “stick.” The more likely you are to find long-term success and connection.
We’ve found this approach reduces the time you are in therapy and actually helps you navigate the difficulty more gently and successfully. This approach is especially effective with relationships facing significant difficulty or challenge.
Marriage-Neutral vs. Marriage-Friendly
Well Marriage Center holds marriage as an important personal, professional, and social value. We believe in helping couples save, heal, and restore their marriage if that is possible. Many assume this is what all therapists believe. However, because of our professional training, many therapists hold a “neutral” value orientation towards whether a marriage survives or whether the couple divorces. In the past this neutral value has reduced the therapist’s encouragement to stay together and work out issues and has even led to counselors encouraging couples to separate. This is another reason marriage counseling has deservedly gotten a bad reputation.
Again, the field is changing and we are helping to lead the way. Well Marriage Center is committed to preserving marriage and avoiding divorce whenever possible. In the midst of marital trouble and distress, we’ll support the hope that you can heal and save your marriage. We’ve seen countless couples who are convinced their relationship is too far dead and gone, only to see it be rediscovered and revitalized before their very eyes (and hearts). We’ve seen it happen. We know how to help it happen for you.
The Bottom Line
Couples get better here. Not only that, they stay better because their relationship is stronger and their connection is deeper. ”Better” looks different for each unique relationship and is the only criteria we care about and monitor. The marriage counseling process can work wonders when guided by a specialized, trained, and experienced counselor. To that reality, at Well Marriage Center you are:
- Guaranteed a therapist who works exclusively with couples.
- Guaranteed a therapist who is trained specifically to help couples succeed.
- Guaranteed a therapist experienced with any and all types of marital problems/distresses
- Guaranteed a therapist who wants your relationship to succeed and will work tirelessly to help you as a couple grow and thrive…together.
We know it takes a lot of courage to ask for assistance, but your relationship is worth it. We’d like to help you. Let us know about your relationship and what services would best suit your needs. Together with you and your partner, we’ll tailor an approach that provides a hopeful way forward.